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Purpose comes in two types. If you are entranced by the many claims purpose can be a magical elixir for your career and life happiness, you need to understand the difference.
Jordan Grumet entered medicine driven by a desire to help people, captured by what he calls “Big P” purpose, which is overly focused on big, meaningful outcomes. It was glamorous but not fulfilling; instead of enjoying the journey he was loathing the path he had committed to, finding joy only when he could find a few minutes to devote to his emerging passion, writing.
He contrasts that situation with what he calls “Little P” purpose, where you don’t focus on some future, grandiose outcome but instead on satisfaction provided by the path or process you have chosen. In that vein, he has written a book about money and purpose, interviewed thought leaders about the good life on his podcasts and assists the dying in a hospice.
“When it comes to purpose, bigger is not better,” he writes in The Purpose Code.
Encouraged by parents and career counsellors, too many of us believe we should aim for ambitious dreams rather than what actually fits our personality. The pressure to find “Big P” purpose only leads, he says, to anxiety. “I often hear my dying patients complain that they spent too much time on their big audacious goals, to the detriment of their own happiness and the enjoyment of what they already had,” he says.
One patient, Toby, dreamed of becoming a U.S. senator but could not gain sufficient funds or support. While dying of Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS), also known as Lou Gehrig’s disease, he lamented that he had never run for the local school board, a job he might have enjoyed just as much, and which would have been much more attainable.
Shanelle’s designer makeup line almost made it onto Shark Tank, losing in the last round. That was followed by setback after setback with her venture and she barely made enough money to subsist. Yet when she became bedbound from multiple sclerosis, she realized her true joy had not been in the boardroom but out front with customers, helping unconfident women feel good about how they looked.
The bigger the goal, he stresses, the more likely we are to fail. Success is often a mix of luck, timing and good genetics; you have to be the right person, at the right time, in the right place. “We will likely not cure cancer, become a billionaire or produce the next mass-consumed item to hit the market. And that’s okay,” he says.
The other problem with Big P purpose, he says, is that it can be fleeting. Once gained, the excitement is replaced by endless worry over its loss. “Even if Toby had made it to the Senate, he could always have been replaced in the next election,” Mr. Grumet says.
Big P purpose is grounded in a scarcity mindset. Success has a narrow focus and often comes at the expense of others. There are a limited number of openings at the top, as the Shark Tank competition illustrates.
“Little P purpose embraces an abundance mentality. There is room for everyone – I mean everyone – to pursue that which brings them inner joy and happiness. This pursuit will never rely on whether someone else is succeeding or failing,” he says.
Think about it as a climb. To enjoy the climb, it should include purposeful activities – anchors that you add, one at a time, while subtracting things from your life that don’t currently provide meaning and joy. He stresses your climb should never be goal oriented. If all you concentrate on is the top of the mountain, you will falter. At the same time, find ways to incorporate an aspect of incremental gain in the process, a controllable way to feel like you are making progress, enhancing your skill set. You need not be monogamous in your climbs; you can try different things.
That’s Little P purpose, and he argues it will provide big gains in your life.
Quick hits
- You won’t LOL at this: A study shows using abbreviations in texting seems insincere to recipients because it signals a lower level of effort from the sender. It makes them less likely to write back.
- Bruce Springsteen, on the way up an elevator in 1972 to audition before legendary music producer John Hammond, pushed back against panic with what he calls mental jiu-jitsu: “I thought, ‘I’ve got nothing, so I’ve got nothing to lose … If nothing happens, I’m going to walk out of here the same person as when I walked in.’”
- “A focused hour outweighs an unfocused day,” observes Ottawa thought leader Shane Parrish.
Harvey Schachter is a Kingston-based writer specializing in management issues. He, along with Sheelagh Whittaker, former CEO of both EDS Canada and Cancom, are the authors of When Harvey Didn’t Meet Sheelagh: Emails on Leadership.