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I have always been puzzled about the “battle” against cancer. Obituaries often refer to the deceased as having “courageously” lost the battle with cancer.
I have no doubt about the courage, but I wondered whether the “battle” was necessary or beneficial.
The war analogy extends to the living. Those who have had cancer and are still living are called “survivors.”
I know people with cancer who have spent tens or even hundreds of thousands of dollars travelling to other countries seeking a magic potion, medical or natural, to cure their condition. Sufferers explore every possible avenue to combat the disease. I suppose that is what is meant by their “battle.” The cancer is an enemy that must be exterminated, whatever the cost.
These issues took on special meaning for me 18 months ago when, at the age of 79, I was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer of the prostate. It had spread to pelvic lymph nodes, making local excision or radiotherapy impossible. So I was prescribed hormone therapy and was told the cancer would likely return in 12 to 18 months, and kill me in 48 months.
I was shocked. I come from a (mostly) long-lived family and had expected to roll along until my 90s, like my mother.
I was angry and bitter that my life was being cut short when I still had so much to do. It took a visit to the Lourdes sanctuary in France 12 months ago to teach me acceptance.
I then got to wondering how I should deal with my cancer, whether I should “battle” it as do many others, or whether there was any softer approach worth trying.
In dealing with many of life’s issues I have followed an old adage: Do not start a war that you cannot win.
Being doubtful as to whether I could win this one, I decided to deal with my cancer positively by following doctor’s orders regarding treatment, eschewing non-medical, “natural” remedies, and living life to the fullest. I remain active and enjoy all four dimensions of my life: physical, social, intellectual and spiritual.
“Listen to your body” is a common precept used by health and fitness experts, and is recommended in the context of how long to push yourself in a mentally or physically stressful situation. The advice means you must stop an activity when your body tells you to stop.
Now, I am a retired physician who specialized in psychiatry, and it occurred to me that if you can listen to your body, can you not also talk to it?
After all, in a way, we talk to our body, our muscles, when practising relaxation, meditation or mindfulness. Our muscles listen, and studies have shown that profound psychophysiological changes result and that this is an effective way of dealing with stress and illness.
We can connect also with “silent” organs such as the heart, liver or prostate by “visualizing” them in our minds in an intense and focused manner during mindfulness or meditation and cause changes to occur.
During my daily visualizations, I ask my cancer cells to delay spreading as long as possible to enable their fellow cells from other organs to function normally. After all, cancer cells are a living part of my body even though they are also pathological and “foreign.”
If the cells spread, they will kill me and therefore also themselves.
The cancer cells are my own cells that have been transformed, and have developed the capacity to multiply, invade and damage normal tissues.
Speaking to your cells may be a way of “fighting” cancer, though I do not believe the battle analogy is applicable. I prefer to compare this approach to legal concepts such as mediation or dispute resolution.
Cancer is the adversary, true, but the way to deal with it is not to do battle, but to bargain toward a resolution. War is the end result of strongly held adversarial positions, and I believe my approach is the antithesis of adversarial.
Cancer is an unpleasant condition, and medicine is making great strides in dealing with it. There is accumulating evidence that mental attitude and lifestyle can delay progression of the disease. If these approaches work, they do so by promoting psychophysiological changes and strengthening immunological defences.
So far, my cancer cells have kept a low profile, and I am hoping that this remains their response to my “conversation” with them.
I hope to keep it that way as long as possible. I know I cannot beat them through war, but perhaps we can come to a negotiated settlement of our dispute.
François Mai lives in Ottawa.