Affectionately called Bachan (Japanese for grandmother), Matsuko was a quiet rebel who defied some Japanese conventions but embraced others in her fiercely independent life.
Matsuko lived in Japan with her mother, brother and three sisters. During the Second World War they endured many hardships, including the atomic bombings and lack of food and shelter. After the war, Matsuko's mother arranged a marriage for her that would have provided financial security for the whole family. After meeting the prospective groom, Matsuko refused to go through with the marriage because she did not love him, causing an enormous amount of shame and grief within the family.
Then, in 1954, Matsuko had the audacity to marry a Canadian soldier, Harry Creagen, whom she had met while working at a military base. Marrying "the enemy," and a white man to boot, was too much for Matsuko's mother, who refused to acknowledge their presence. She began talking to Matsuko again after the birth of Matsuko's first son, Michael.
In 1955, Matsuko landed in Toronto, giving birth to Harry the next year. She was briefly given an English name, Betty, but in late 1950s Toronto, non-whites were a novelty and the name was no shield from racism. People would openly point and stare in grocery stores, but Matsuko handled it stoically, and she never let it defeat her spirit.
Receiving cooking lessons from a soldier used to eating army food in the barracks led to some disastrous initial meals. Matsuko couldn't understand why the first chicken she cooked was swimming in grease until she realized it was a duck. She quickly took the reins in the kitchen and made her signature bread rolls, carrot muffins and chocolate chip cookies ( Bachan cookies) for family to enjoy. They soon became her currency for thanking bus drivers, doctors, bankers, neighbours and friends - anyone she felt had helped her, especially in her later years of physical struggle with osteoporosis and stenosis.
Matsuko revelled in her role as mother and homemaker, a Japanese tradition she didn't buck. A soldier's life entailed a move to a new base every couple of years, and she provided a comfortable family home. In later years, she became a feisty grandmother to her four grandchildren.
Having lived independently since Harry's death in 1997 from dementia, Matsuko found her last weeks in hospital an adjustment as she accepted help from those she had spent her life looking after. She still managed her trademark "shaddup" and smile whenever one of us annoyed her. But she provided a lesson in strength through quiet acceptance of her looming fate. Matsuko's diminutive size, all of five feet and 105 pounds, belied her huge presence in our lives.
Michael Creagen is Matsuko's son.