Canada forward Alphonso Davies reacts after a loss to Morocco at the Al Thumama Stadium in Doha, Qatar, on Dec. 1.Nathan Denette/The Canadian Press
Ahead of Canada’s final game in Qatar, understandably worried about how it would end, coach John Herdman was keen to wrap things up.
He went on for a while about how much this team had learned and grown. Then he wandered off piste a bit.
“My probably favourite moment to date has been [Belgian assistant coach] Thierry Henry’s comments after the Belgium game, that [Belgium] should have lost that game today. That’s everything we dreamed of as a team,” Herdman said.
You sort of get what he’s trying to say, but what?
Who cares what a guy holding the clipboard on a team that got bounced out of here like a tennis ball thinks? How is being congratulated for losing “everything you dreamed of”?
After two weeks of extended contact, you can now see the weird disconnect in the Canadian senior men’s program.
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The Canadians played like gamers. They lost. They talked like winners.
They may think that makes them look resolute, when in fact it makes them seem delusional.
Between the buzzwords (“learnings”, “brotherhood”) and the relentless positivity, this Canada outfit doesn’t sound like a serious national soccer outfit. It sounds like a bunch of guys who went for a boys’ weekend at a yoga retreat and can’t stop gushing about it.
Canada kept saying it had “shocked the world” by failing to lose to Belgium by a ton of goals. I’m not sure that formulation was used by any non-Canadian, but let’s say that’s true.
After Morocco broke Belgium’s will to carry on, the only team shocking anybody was Belgium. By that point, Canada was being thrashed by Croatia and nobody was thinking about it at all any more.
But Canada couldn’t stop talking like it was the new Brazil (the one that, you know, never wins anything).
“Now teams will want to play Canada,” Herdman said after that final loss to Morocco, a clinic of anti-tactics. “This is what we wanted to do in this tournament. Now our players have been seen. Our coaching staff’s been seen.”
By whom? For what purpose? And which coaches aside from the one in charge? This was Herdman’s way of saying that things had gone well for Herdman. And he’s right. They did. He’s on the international map now.
That is also true of a few others – Tajon Buchanan, certainly. Stephen Eustaquio, possibly. Alistair Johnston, maybe. A few guys on the edges got their highlight reel.
But what I’ll remember is the transformation of Alphonso Davies. As this started, Canada’s only bonafide star seemed willing to go along with the plan (one that was always changing). By the final match, he was off on a one-man seek-and-destroy mission. Forget recognizable shapes. Davies was busting his hump to create a huge, squiggly heat map extending to every corner of the pitch.
There was the suggestion here that Davies’s outsize quality and luxury work situation could be a problem for Canada. What if the exact opposite is the case?
What if Davies is the only top-class professional on a team of small-fries, some of whom are smaller than others? Because that’s what it seemed like by the end.
A guy who plays at one of the biggest clubs in the world looking around and thinking, ‘We’re doing what now? Because why?’ No wonder he didn’t want to talk. Talking might have been mistaken for an endorsement.
Where Canada was great was in its organic connection between certain players, Buchanan and Davies in particular. Everyone else was trying very hard, but had difficulty getting the message straight.
Communication gaffes were the real story of Canada’s tournament. The missed penalty that wasn’t discussed. The inability to figure out a new approach on the fly when it held the lead in the second game. The farcical exchange at the back against Morocco. And, most of all, the amateurish, public needling of Croatia. Canada talked togetherness, but walked something different.
It’s natural that Canada feels insecure. Not because we haven’t been at a World Cup in 36 years, but because we’re Canada. Running around at an international gathering shouting “WORLD CLASS” is our national M.O.
On the back of the bus that ferried the Canadian team around Doha, there was a series of climate pledges, brought to you by a car company. Canada: No. 41 at men’s soccer; No. 1 at irony.
Above the pledges was an activating phrase: “If Canada scores a goal …” (e.g. “… I will plant and grow my own vegetables.”)
After Canada scored, someone put duct tape over the “If.” Mission accomplished, I guess?
Canada needn’t feel too insecure. Our players run, pass and comport themselves as well as anyone. But their lack of polish was exposed, sometimes brutally. Canada is still playing checkers while the best soccer countries play three-dimensional chess. That’s not going to get better just because TSN got boffo ratings.
The combination of mediocre product with off-field bluster created a unique tension in Qatar. And not the fun sort.
One of the great things about soccer culture is its forthrightness. If the team is bad, the coach will say that. Same goes for any player’s performance. You don’t have to trash anyone. But trying to buff up an inferior effort is seen as disingenuous, and a bit sad.
It’s only in North America where coaches are expected to treat top professionals like high-schoolers, constantly reassuring them after things go wrong. That’s how Canada seemed here – fragile, outside the norms of elite soccer culture and, most of all, very North American.
Germany had a better tournament than Canada. Not by German standards, of course, but purely in terms of numbers. It did get four points.
On Friday, a couple of us were chatting with a veteran German reporter about the team he covers. What’s going on there?
“They have no courage,” he said.
He wasn’t trying to be provocative. He didn’t say it with any heat. That’s just how people talk in this sport after someone loses games they could or should have won.
So how did Canada do here? That depends on what you want from it.
If you would like to see the Canadians make World Cups, be talked about at home and maybe get a shoutout from Thierry Henry because they lose with panache, then Canada did amazing.
If you would like to see Canada winning important matches at World Cups, then this wasn’t good enough. There’s nothing shameful about that. It was everyone’s first time, and things don’t always work out.
But if you want it to be better, someone’s going to have to say that out loud. It may even hurt some feelings.
No more high fives for scoring a single goal in a game you lost by three. No more nonsense about how collapsing against Morocco for the first half hour was all part of the plan. Don’t say “shocked the world” ever again. You mildly intrigued the world. And the world has already forgotten you, because the adults are playing now.
Most of all, don’t let anyone pat Canada on the head and then thank it. By 2026, Canada should be congratulating others for being classy in defeat, not seeking reassurance from those who will probably never rate us, and definitely don’t care.
The World Cup’s biggest hits and misses (so far)
The purpose of the first two weeks of a World Cup is establishing the storylines. Who should we be paying attention to? What should we be talking about? Why does your boss keep checking to see if you’re ‘Active’ on the company Slack? You are. You’re just not paying attention.
Now that the preliminary World Cup is over, we can begin the real World Cup.
The quality has been good so far. Not wildly good, but good. The best thing that can be said of this iteration is that it is unpredictable. But there are still a couple of weeks to fix that.
I’ll believe this is the World Cup that fooled everyone if Japan – the most surprising, as well as the most delightful, team here – is still in it a week from now.
Team of the tournament
GK – Wojciech Szczesny, Poland
D – Jordi Alba, Spain
D – Thiago Silva, Brazil
D – Achraf Hakimi, Morocco
M – Luka Modric, Croatia
M – Casemiro, Brazil
M – Ao Tanaka, Japan
M – Christian Pulisic, USA
F – Richarlison, Brazil
F – Cody Gakpo, Netherlands
F – Kylian Mbappé, France
Subs: Marcus Rashford, England; Gavi, Spain; Enner Valencia, Ecuador; Bruno Fernandes, Portugal; Tajon Buchanan, Canada
MVP of the tournament
Wojciech Szczesny. Poland is in the knockout rounds because it has a 6-foot-5 octopus in net. Szczesny has made about four superhuman saves each game, including robbing Lionel Messi on a penalty. His club team, Juventus, may fire him just so it can get the credit for signing him again. However, unless Szczesny scores goals as well, Poland may be in a spot of bother going forward. A totally subjective guess at the MVP once this is over: Brazil’s Casemiro.
Performer of the tournament
Gianni Infantino. The best sports bosses are Bond villains. Otherwise, where’s the fun? After six mostly anonymous years on the job, FIFA supremo Infantino is really leaning into evil here in Qatar. He gave an entirely unhinged speech to begin things (which did have the sneaky-smart effect of putting himself up on a hook instead of the host country). In the face of withering international scorn, he has been Qatar’s most steadfast defender. He even lives here, presumably inside a huge, hollowed-out rock shaped like a skull. He is also seemingly everywhere, up in the rafters each night, looking far too pleased with himself. After Canada’s early howler against Morocco, the camera panned up to a giggling Infantino. We’ll get you. We will have our vengeance, in this life or the … wait, that’s Gladiator.
Goal of the tournament
Richarlison against Serbia. The trick with bicycle kicks is, first, do no harm (to your own reputation). Nothing looks worse than a flubbed bicycle kick. Brazil’s Richarlison risked this embarrassment against Serbia and came out looking golden. Everything about it was perfect – the read, the timing, the precision. A good bicycle kick isn’t just powerful, it’s aimed. Unsighted (because he was upside-down and backward at the time), Richarlison sneaked it in the corner of the Serbian net. It’s the reason he is a (mildly surprising) standout performer on a Brazil team jammed with superstars.
Great disappointment
Belgium. This could be Germany, but it didn’t melt down in public as well as get bounced. Ahead of the tournament, Belgian star Kevin De Bruyne told a journalist his team couldn’t win here because it was “too old.” De Bruyne’s 31. So he wasn’t talking about himself. After losing to Morocco, Jan Vertonghen, 35, reportedly got into it with De Bruyne in the locker room. After their final game, the team’s other major star, Romelu Lukaku, punched the dugout. It was the first target he hit all night. The coach quit in the news conference afterward, and more resignations will follow. Say this much for the Belgians – this zany performance in Qatar may be the most interesting thing a group of Belgians has ever done.
Great surprise
Japan. Everyone’s new, second-favourite team. Japan recently paid $14-billion for a Summer Olympics it didn’t want to put on and very few people came to. In terms of sports karma, it was owed big time. This World Cup is giving Japan everything the Olympics didn’t. After beating Germany and Spain, it has earned the world’s attention and admiration. But this time, it doesn’t cost it anything and it doesn’t have to clean up after guests.
Just great, period
Nobody. Contrary to what we’ve been told, you are allowed have a World Cup in which no team is the blindingly obvious favourite going into the knockout rounds. Brazil has been most consistently excellent, but it hasn’t looked overpowering against mediocre opposition. England licked Iran and Wales, but was pushed around by the United States. Spain scored for fun and then lost to Japan. Ditto France against Tunisia. Argentina’s just barely hanging on, and it’s the bookies’ second favourite to win it.
So far, this is the World Cup in which the best anyone can hope for is being just good enough.